Romantic Love: Feeling or Choice?

From Hollywood to Cleo, the cultural representations of Romantic Love are clear: it’s a spontaneous feeling of attraction and affection for another. And like all feelings, we don’t choose it: it’s something that just happens to us. We spontaneously ‘fall’ into love and we are powerless to prevent it. To be sure when it strikes,…

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Romance in Scripture

  Why is the Song of Songs favoured by mystics? What is it about this book in the Bible that attracts so much attention? Surely the answer is that the language – poetic, erotic and sensual – speaks profoundly to the hearts of those who hunger for intimacy with the lover of our souls. This…

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Sexuality – A Resource for Loving

Sexuality touches upon every aspect of our personhood, body and soul, and it is expressed as either masculinity or femininity. It is developed and expressed primarily through relationships. Our masculinity or femininity draws us into relationship and makes us attractive to the other sex. When we are attracted to another, our good qualities are brought…

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Couple Prayer

Praying as an individual is vital to our Christian journey. As a married couple, you can also do couple prayer. This is prayer in personal conversation with God while allowing our spouse to hear. It’s a bit like a three way conversation. When we pray in this way, we are authentic and honest as there…

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Marriage or Matrimony?

Are you getting married ‘in the Church’ or simply ‘at a church’? People call a lot of things ‘marriage’. Everything from heterosexual cohabitation (common law marriage) to civil contracts (secular marriage) to the Judeo-Christian concept of covenant. In a Christian marriage there is a desire for the marriage to be open to the Lord and…

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Reality Check: Cohabitation

Cohabitation is a general term that refers to a number of different living arrangements. These comments refer to those couples who are both living together and also sexually active, (that is, they are not just sharing a residence as friends) and are not in a permanent alternative to marriage (de-facto relationship). Despite the widely held…

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The Power of Forgiveness

Let’s face it, your fiancé is not the only person who can or has hurt or disappointed you. Outside injuries, whether new or ancient, limit your ability to trust or to be completely generous and they often drive your behaviour. You can overreact to each other because of something someone else has done to you…

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Free to Love

The challenge before you is to learn to love the other effectively and to do so wholeheartedly and consistently with God’s abundant grace. Clearly some couples are ‘natural couples’; their formation makes it easy for them to express love in ways that are appreciated by the other. Other couples need to be constantly alert and…

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My Family of Origin

People often say that “you marry into a family”. This is certainly true in that you gain a whole new set of relatives, but it is also true in that you will be exposed to all the customs, traditions, and family values that are characteristic of the people to whom your fiancé belongs. More significantly,…

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Formation – Family of Origin

This session is designed to help you see clearly the pictures in your brain of what you think is right and normal. That is, your unconscious expectations of the dynamic between husband and wife – what it means to be husband and father or wife and mother. Even if your parents were extraordinarily happy in…

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