Modest is NOT Hottest

 The fashion industry called for shorter shorts, and lower necklines; a bigger chest and thinner legs; perfectly shaped eyebrows, and a pencil thin waist. I was told constantly exactly what I needed to look like to be hot, to be desired, and to be sexy to my male counterparts.

Well, there was one problem. I, being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, believed in modesty. And pretty much 9 out of 10 outfits on the ads around me were anything but modest. This being considered, you can imagine my happiness when I first heard the phrase “Modest Is Hottest” at my Young Women church meeting. The idea that I could be modest AND hot was pretty appealing.

Or so it seemed.

It’s been many years since I first heard that phrase, and I would like to share something I have learned after a combination of mistakes along with a whole chunk of trial and error on my part:

Modest Is NOT Hottest.

I’m coming out and telling you something I was never told, because it is something that needs to be understood.

If you want to be “hot” if you want to be “sexy” if you want to be “eye candy” you will not find that while keeping your shorts long, and necklines high.

Seductive eyes and enhanced body parts are “hot”.

Exposed stomachs and push up bras are “hot”.

The teeny tiny bikini your mom would not let you buy is “hot”.

Unblemished, soft, hairless, skin showing bodies are “hot”.

The idea that we can be virtuous and walk around looking “hot” at the same time does not add up.

It does not happen.

We as women want to be loved, we want to be valued, we want someone to surprise us with roses, and write us cute love songs on their guitar, we want to be in love with a man we can call our best friend. But somewhere along the way we have been falsely led to believe that in order to be loved… in order to be valued, we need to be sexually appealing and that if we are appealing, that love we seek will come to us.

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