Couple Decision Making

Behind every behaviour or decision that you make, is a value; something that you hold in high esteem and is advanced in some way by the action. For example, making the choice to work back late, may reflect any one of a number of values, such as: having pride in doing a job well, reducing…

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Displacing Contempt with Respect

Want to give your marriage heart burn? Try treating each other with contempt. Contempt has been identified as a corrosive relationship pattern among couples headed for bust. An expression of despisal, contempt is the toxic cousin to criticism. Contempt is a devastating weapon when deployed by manipulative abusers, where the recipient is beaten down by…

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Sexual Differences – Respect & Cherishment

Gender differences – Respect & Cherishment WP

When we understand our sexual differences, we are empowered to use them constructively to build great relationships.  We’ve always maintained that our differences are something to celebrate; that they allow us to more deeply appreciate the unique contribution we each make to our shared life. We can be different, with differing abilities in various areas,…

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Discover your Unique Love Profile

Do you know your love needs and love busters? Do the quiz below to determine your top five love needs and worst three love busters. Love Need: a behaviour or gesture which communicates love to you and helps you feel close and connected to your spouse. Of the following list, choose the five Love Needs that…

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Video: Love and Respect

This interview with one of our favourite authors and marriage educators – Emmerson Eggerichs – is brilliantly insightful. In it he discusses how men and women experience love differently and how so many couples get into difficult through a failure to understand this dynamic. He also applies the theory to parenting with some powerful insights.…

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What my girly novels taught me about love

Selected from Agi Reefman’s blog: New Hope Talks When I wrote this post I was eyeball deep in some heavy theology. Seeing as my brain was pretty much fried from all that reading, I put away my usual reading material for some easy fluffy chick lit. You know the kind: boy meets girl, love at…

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Have you been lied to? Part I

Re-posted with permission by Agi Reefman Last week on my blog post, one person asked the question, “What’s this lie you’re talking about?” It was an excellent question which really made me think about the most straight forward way of answering to answer it. A Lap Dance And it reminded me of a Facebook post I’d…

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Video: Movies & Manhood

TED talk: When Colin Stokes’ 3-year-old son caught a glimpse of Star Wars, he was instantly obsessed. But what messages did he absorb from the sci-fi classic? Stokes asks for more movies that send positive messages to boys: that cooperation is heroic, and respecting women is as manly as defeating the villain. (Filmed at TEDxBeaconStreet.)…

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Respect & Cherishment

What’s the Diff? While everyone experiences love uniquely, some clear gender patterns have emerged through relationship research. In one study, when given the option between the negative choices of being ‘alone and unloved in all the world’ or ‘inadequate and disrespected by everyone’, 74% of men preferred be alone and unloved, compared to only minority…

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Love Busters and Love Builders

||love busters love builders

What are Love Busters and Love Builders? Love Builders: a behaviour or gesture which communicates love to you and helps you feel close and connected to your spouse. Some Examples: Cherishment Caring for me, being tender and gentle with me Being of service to me, doing things for me that I enjoy Nurturing me, doting…

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