Defiant Hope

Advent is a season of anticipation. The birth of any child, not least the Messiah, gives us cause for hope. Earlier this week, we heard the testimony of Chris and Natalie Stefanick, a couple who had journeyed through dark seasons in their marriage. Having survived sexual abuse as a child, Natalie found she needed many…

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Myths about Arguments

When it comes to marriage and relationship, there are a lot of myths out there. Here are five of the most common. Myth 1: Good couples don’t argue. The presence or absence of arguments is not a good indicator of the health of a marriage. Some couples who don’t argue are living detached, parallel lives.…

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Four Divorces and a Funeral

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If you’re over the age of forty you might recall the 1994 movie “Four Weddings and a Funeral”. While it’s not a particularly memorable movie, the title seems to have an unexpected stickiness to it. Four Divorces and a Funeral – that’s pretty much what our life has been in the past month; a string…

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Help For Marriages Under Stress

January is typically the peak month for divorce applications in English-speaking countries. Having made the decision to divorce, many couples agree to postpone the application for one last Christmas together as a family. The parents hope that by delaying the devastating news until after Christmas, the children will be able to enjoy the day and then have a few weeks…

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Lessons from Mr and Mrs Smith

Earlier this week the news reported that Angelina Jolie had filed for divorce from Brad Pitt. Together for over a decade and married for two years, the Brangelina match appears to be over. Irrespective of the reasons for the breakdown of their marriage (and why it is anyone else’s business anyway), every broken marriage is…

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Avoiding the Divorce Flu

Divorce is Contagious

A new study has documented what counsellors have observed for years: divorce is contagious. Just like a virus, divorce spreads among social networks and influences marriages among the divorcing couple’s friends, family and work colleagues. For example, got a divorced sibling? Your chances of divorcing go up by 22%. A divorced friend? Up by 147%.…

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Making the Connection…with Arguments

Neither of us likes it when we disagree, yet we’ve had more than a few in our 28 years of marriage – some of them leading to horrible arguments. When disagreements descend into arguments, they usually become hurtful and unproductive, leaving us feeling bitter and exhausted. But are arguments all bad, or always harmful? Many…

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The Marriage Kit: Why Marry?

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Couples marry for all sorts of reasons, but one of the almost universal expectations of couples is that marriage will make them happy. It is after all a dominant emotion of the romance experience. But is this really what marriage is for? In this short video we explore happiness and the true purpose of marriage.…

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Breaking Through

Every marriage goes through seasons – seasons of delight and seasons of heartache.Sometimes, those dark seasons are simple missteps that are corrected quickly and overcome with an even deeper tenderness the result. Sometimes they can seem interminable – stretching into a hope-voided distance. Whatever your season of marriage, the SmartLoving BreakThrough workshop is an essential experience. Unlike…

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