Social Attitudes
The BS Detector
Mind Over Matter ‘Mind Reading’ is one of those clairvoyant arts that seems to elude us when it comes to marriage. Too often we make the mistake of assuming that our spouse knows what we need without communicating clearly about it. How many times have we, or our spouse, declared in exasperation to the…
Read MorePositive Thinking
Capitalise on the Positive Most marriage counselling and education focuses on conflict and incompatibility. It seeks to help couples find constructive ways of dealing with challenges in the relationship. It’s a kind of ‘damage control’ approach that seeks to minimize the impact of negative experiences. One of the strategies for couples that is often…
Read MoreA Habit of Thanks
Think Positive I was very pessimistic as a teenager. I tended to see everything negatively, and even when something good happened, I always noted how it could be better. I didn’t make very good company, even for myself. That changed when I fell in love, and learned a new way of relating to the world.…
Read MoreSpare the Left-Overs
It’s that time of year again – the season of joy and gluttony. By the time Christmas day is over, our refrigerator will be filled with yummy, delectable left-overs. Unfortunately, not all left-overs are so delicious. Too often in a marriage, instead of our best selves, we serve up the less than appetising left-overs. We…
Read MoreMarriage or Matrimony?
People call a lot of relationships ‘marriage’. Everything from cohabitation (common law marriage) to civil contracts (secular marriage) to the Judeo-Christian concept of covenant. In a Christian marriage there is a desire for the marriage to be open to the Lord and a willingness to look to scripture and the Church community for direction. If…
Read More#21 Beyond Feelings
The world of feelings is vitally important to life and relationships. But what does current research and best practice tell us about how to understand them, and orient them for the best outcomes in our relationships? Guest: Shawn Van der Linden (Bth, BSW, AMHSW) CatholicPsych Institute: Master Mentor and International Programs Consultant Managing Director: Altum…
Read MoreAttention Deficit Marriages
In a fast-paced world, our attention is a rare and valuable commodity. Is your marriage suffering from attention deficit? True confession: some evenings you’ll find us sitting on the couch with the TV playing and us both on our laptops or other individual devices. We know; it’s not particularly noble and we have a sense…
Read MoreThree Things I Wish I Knew Before We Got Married
The benefit of hindsight! There’s not a couple on earth who doesn’t have some words of wisdom about marriage to share with the young. I came across this on Facebook and was immediately impressed with insights articulated by this newlywed husband. We hope the SmartLoving community will find it helpful, and we’d love to hear what…
Read MoreHow Senior Couples Make Marriage Better
In a culture that glorifies youth and sanctions the euthanising of the sick and elderly, it’s easy to lose sight of the gift of seniors. Here are three ways that senior couples make marriage better for all of us. Earlier this year, Pope Francis released a series of homilies on the elderly. Each one explores…
Read MoreWhy Reality TV Makes Us Stupider
These days we rightly talk a lot about exploitation and abuse. It comes in many forms and we worry we might walk past it without noticing. Recently 665,000 Australians not only walked past but sat and watched something that we should recognise for what it really is – workplace exploitation abuse. The airing of ‘reality’…
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