Communication
Positive Thinking
Capitalise on the Positive Most marriage counselling and education focuses on conflict and incompatibility. It seeks to help couples find constructive ways of dealing with challenges in the relationship. It’s a kind of ‘damage control’ approach that seeks to minimize the impact of negative experiences. One of the strategies for couples that is often overlooked…
Read MoreA Habit of Thanks
Think Positive I was very pessimistic as a teenager. I tended to see everything negatively, and even when something good happened, I always noted how it could be better. I didn’t make very good company, even for myself. That changed when I fell in love, and learned a new way of relating to the world.…
Read MoreAddicted to Busy
Busy Bees “I’m a very busy person. Don’t waste my time!” How often have we heard that line! Busyness in our culture has become endemic. We don’t know anybody who isn’t busy. Even retirees are busy. Our kids are busier than we ever were, running from this activity, to that ball game, to those training…
Read MoreOn a Mission to Love
Invest in Love Our ten year old son is a great rugby player. He spends hours in the backyard kicking the ball around, usually over the neighbours’ fence! He eats, sleeps and talks rugby. And if he’s not playing rugby, he’s watching it on TV or ‘playing’ it on the X-Box. It’s not surprising that…
Read MoreMarried Singles Unhappily Ever After
We all start out in marriage with a dream; a dream of a life-long, love affair. But after a year or two, disillusionment sets in and the unreserved trust and intimacy we enjoyed becomes tentative and fragile. We join the army of other ‘married singles’ living our parallel lives and wishing that the other sex…
Read MoreWedding Stress: Dealing with In-laws
When you marry, you marry into a family. And your fiancé gets more than just a new spouse, he/she gets another branch of the family – your family! Read on for tips on handling tension with in-laws. This is how it has always been, but in recent decades, the reality of extended family has come…
Read MoreFinding Reverse
Stuck in drive When visiting Rome recently, we borrowed a friend’s car to drive out of the city for a day. Everything was going fine (despite the fact that Roman drivers ignore the lane markings!), until we turned down a one way street the wrong way. Another car, traveling in the right direction, stopped, waiting…
Read MoreGender Complementarity
Are we from the same planet? The popularity of John Gray’s “Men are from Mars & Women are from Venus” (and titles by other authors), signals the widespread recognition of gender differences in our society. It is now permissible to speak of stereotypical behaviours and gender specific abilities without being accused of putting the clock…
Read MoreThe Ikea Assembly Meltdown
Building your own furniture… it’s an unstated test of true manhood. Guys gravitate to the challenge, particularly when it’s a guaranteed shoo-in. Meet the Ikea* Challenge… it’s supposed to be easy right? Any idiot can assemble an Ikea item. That’s the first good reason why any self-respecting guy isn’t going to use the instructions. The…
Read MoreHug to Diffuse
When the tension mounts, what can couples do to restore their harmony? The Connect Hug is simple and powerful. Learn how to hug to diffuse. It’s happening again. Suddenly we find ourselves in that all too familiar territory: we’re gridlocked in an argument about goodness-knows-what and it’s starting to turn nasty. Our spirits deflate. We…
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