Blog
Virtue in Action
In many of our courses, we teach couples strategies and skills for navigating relationships more effectively. As important as these frameworks are, research suggests that they are not the critical factor in avoiding divorce or building a successful marriage. Rather, the key appears to lie elsewhere, in the practice of virtues. Virtues are personal characteristics…
Read MoreTeaching love to university students
Later this year, population experts and pronatalists will meet in Texas to explore practical solutions to declining worldwide fertility. It’s one of several signs that attitudes to fertility rates are shifting. Fertility rates have been in decline for decades, and not just in developed countries like North America, Europe and Australia. China and India have…
Read MoreHow can I make your day better?
I read a blog post recently from a husband who brought his marriage back from the brink with this one simple, daily habit. Each morning he asked his wife: how can I make your day better? The wife was suspicious at first and deliberately gave him tedious and demanding tasks, like cleaning out the garage,…
Read MoreTwelve Ways of Christmas
Christmas is more than a day – it’s a season! It’s easy to overlook the birthday boy in the festivities of Christmas Day. When our children were little, we would have a birthday cake for Jesus to help them more readily relate to this significant feast. And yes, sometimes we even sang ‘happy birthday’ to…
Read MoreMore than “I’m Sorry”
Saying sorry and asking for forgiveness are two very different factors in resolving arguments. Saying Sorry is Simple We were in the midst of yet another disagreement. We were both hurt, and we knew it was time to let go of our case and make up. But it’s hard to say sorry. It’s even harder…
Read MoreGoing From Good To Better
Marital health is about more than minimizing conflict. If we want to go from ‘good’ to ‘better’ we need to capitalise on the positives. Most marriage counselling and education focuses on conflict and incompatibility. It seeks to help couples find constructive ways of dealing with challenges in the relationship. It’s a ‘damage control’ approach that…
Read MoreThree Ways to a Better Advent
The Church New Year begins with Advent and is a season of preparation ahead of the birthday of Jesus. Beginning four Sundays before Christmas Day, it’s intended to be a period of intensified spiritual activity. Yet this time of year for most families is already over-full. Between graduations, corporate Christmas parties and extended retail hours,…
Read MoreAttachment Style and Marriage
Our earliest experiences of love and care profoundly influence what we each bring into our marriage. Attachment Theory illuminates how. As infants, we are completely dependent on our parents for basic physical needs like food and clothing. We also rely on them to provide affection, stimulation and soothing of distress. Research shows that the rapid…
Read MoreThe Growth Mindset
At our daughter’s recent award assembly, the school Principal addressed the topic of ‘Growth Mindset’. She noted how education was more than merely preparing students for exams and aiming for maximum marks on their university entrance ranking. In a country where we have national examinations of all school children every two years from the age…
Read MoreTogether again… for stronger and better
Contrary to popular belief, separation does not always end in divorce. Well supported, the process of separation can help a couple address their problems and reconcile stronger and better. Reconciliation between separated couples is not that uncommon – about 10-15% according to some commentators. Although headed for divorce, these couples reversed course and repaired their…
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