Posts by Francine & Byron Pirola
Boundaries
The proverb, “Good fences make good neighbours” has a great deal of wisdom. The concept of having clearly defined boundaries helps us to develop healthy relationships. When people know the limits of what they can demand from a relationship, it allows all parties to enjoy it. Hidden agendas evaporate and positive feeling in the relationship…
Read MoreThe Maybe Baby Conversation
How do couples decide when and how many children to have? The Maybe Baby Conversation can Help. During our engagement, we took lessons in a Fertility Awareness Method (FAM), then known as Natural Family Planning. Wanting to live a Catholic marriage, we accepted the Church’s wisdom and rejected contraception to follow her moral teaching.…
Read MoreThe Other Sex
Language Matters For years, advocates of inclusive language have been steadily drawing our attention to the clumsy use of language which can alienate various ethnic groups or religious adherents, the elderly, the young, the disabled, the poor, or even whole sexes. Why? Because language is more than just about communicating our thoughts effectively. Language…
Read MoreThe Natural Revolution
Rediscovering Fertility Awareness We’ve been promoting and teaching Fertility Awareness Methods (FAMs – also known as Natural Family Planning) for over two decades. One of the things we hear often, is how couples, and especially women, lament that they didn’t hear about FAMs earlier. Disenchanted with popular contraceptives, they welcome a natural…
Read MoreSuccess Breeds Success
You Don’t Need to Fail in Order to Succeed A lot of people think that having a few failed relationships is helpful in preparing them for marriage. Some even go as so far as seeing the first marriage itself as a ‘training ground’ for the grand love that is expected to follow. They…
Read MoreRole Models for Marriage
How can we inspire young people to embrace stable, loving marriages when so many grow up without seeing them? We’ve all heard stories that stop us in our tracks. One that sticks with us is about a teacher in an inner-city U.S. primary school who discovered her students didn’t know what a wedding was.…
Read MoreThe BS Detector
Mind Over Matter ‘Mind Reading’ is one of those clairvoyant arts that seems to elude us when it comes to marriage. Too often we make the mistake of assuming that our spouse knows what we need without communicating clearly about it. How many times have we, or our spouse, declared in exasperation to the…
Read MoreLeaving and Cleaving is Complicated!
Origin Families and their Impact “A man leaves his father and his mother and clings to his wife, and they become one flesh.” (Gen 2:24) On our wedding day, we joyfully left our family homes to begin our married life together. Living and worshipping in the same parish, with similar ethnic heritage and family structure,…
Read MorePositive Thinking
Capitalise on the Positive Most marriage counselling and education focuses on conflict and incompatibility. It seeks to help couples find constructive ways of dealing with challenges in the relationship. It’s a kind of ‘damage control’ approach that seeks to minimize the impact of negative experiences. One of the strategies for couples that is often…
Read MoreUnderstanding Compound Wounds
Who would have thought espresso cups could cause such drama? Byron had discarded the unused ‘free’ cups a year earlier, without Francine even noticing their absence. After a frantic search when a guest requested an espresso, she discovered their fate. Despite this information, she experienced a kind of suspende d reality – she…
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