Lent: the ultimate change-maker

Like most people, our optimistic resolutions for the New Year tend to fizzle out before the end of January. Thankfully, Lent gives us another – and a better – chance of success. The Catholic season of Lent gives us an opportunity to get serious about self-improvement. From the Dalai Lama to the most miserable mass…

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Gratitude: Superfood for Relationships

We all seek happiness and are drawn to the things we believe will make us happy. But sometimes, the things we desire fail to deliver. Whether it’s a lotto payout, the dream job, the celebrity-style wedding or the mega mansion in the best part of town, it often turns out that the things we think…

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Gratitude: Plant Now, Reap Later

As we look forward to the new year, lots of us are making resolutions, setting goals, planning for the coming months. Most of our colleagues in the marriage education field are posting articles about setting relationship goals – an excellent idea, but we’d like to propose something different. It has been well established that gratitude…

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In marriage, you get what you look for

  Success in marriage can be as simple as looking for the right things. When we were dating, everything about the other seemed exciting and wonderful. Each discovery about the other was a delight. There were still the stuff ups and let downs, but we lived in an aura of good will, and such disappointments…

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Understanding Compound Wounds

    Who would have thought espresso cups could cause such drama? Byron had discarded the unused ‘free’ cups a year earlier, without Francine even noticing their absence. After a frantic search when a guest requested an espresso, she discovered their fate. Despite this information, she experienced a kind of suspende d reality – she…

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A Habit of Thanks

Think Positive I was very pessimistic as a teenager. I tended to see everything negatively, and even when something good happened, I always noted how it could be better. I didn’t make very good company, even for myself. That changed when I fell in love, and learned a new way of relating to the world.…

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War and Peace on the Home Front

Every nation remembers the sacrifice of their war veterans with a Memorial Day. Thinking about your marriage: is it more of a battlefield than the safe harbour it is intended to be? Through our work with couples, we often encounter those in embattled relationships. They’ve become trapped in a fractious pattern where almost every interaction…

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Three Ways to a Better Advent

The Church New Year begins with Advent and is a season of preparation ahead of the birthday of Jesus. Beginning four Sundays before Christmas Day, it’s intended to be a period of intensified spiritual activity.   Yet this time of year for most families is already over-full. Between graduations, corporate Christmas parties and extended retail hours,…

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Power of Prayer

Prayer does not change God, it does not always change the situation, but it does change the heart of the person praying. Many people do not trust prayer, or doubt it’s power to have an impact. After all, we’ve all had experiences of praying earnestly for something, only to be disappointed when what we sought…

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Passion, Death, and Resurrection in Marriage

Every marriage has elements of passion, death, and resurrection. These seasons of growth, disillusionment and revitalisation are entirely normal, and to be expected. The problem is there’s often a delay before the resurrection manifests. That ‘waiting in the tomb’ is profoundly challenging; in our case it’s never just three days! Here are three thoughts about…

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