The Bethlehem Prayer

Night sky over sand dunes

Through an imaginative encounter with the Holy Family at Bethlehem, God offers consolation and healing for our Family of Origin wounds. It’s very normal when exploring our Family of Origin to surface some pain or hurt.  This might express itself in a sense of loss at what could have been, or a sense of not…

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Leaving and cleaving for the sake of our marriage

A few years ago, Francine was a guest on Vision Radio for marriage week. One of the callers shared how his and his wife’s early ‘family of origin’ formation had caused them a lot of conflict. Their differences in expectations and values had caused them a great deal of grief. All married couples will experience…

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The Easy Way or God’s Way?

Sometimes, poor formation is obvious. Other times, we may not readily recognise its detrimental impact because it seems so natural and compatible. But is the easy way always the best way? Or might God be calling us to something more than what we inherited from our families. Most of the time, the disagreements we have…

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#3 Your Family of Origin

Our family of origin is the most influential formation because our early childhood experiences created the foundation through which all other experiences were interpreted. We like to think that we are independent thinkers and our own person. The truth is, we are products of our upbringing and experiences. Guest: Would you be willing to join…

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The Eleventh Commandment

When God gave Moses the Ten Commandments, he added a postscript for parents: passing on the faith makes parents the first – and most important – educators. Over a period of 24 years, our five children attended Catholic education across six schools. These schools included the local parish school, two private schools, and three regional…

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Programmed for love or for trouble?

We were recently hosted overnight in the country home of friends. It was a beautiful experience in every way. Our hosts greeted us with warmth, housed us in a tastefully appointed bedroom and nourished us with a delightful meal. Their home was a beauty to behold; magnificent views overlooking the valley, landscaped gardens and an…

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Like Parent, Like Child

The most powerful influence on a couple is their family of origin. Good or bad, our experiences in our childhood prepared us for marriage. The young couple sitting opposite us had been married only a few years. They were experiencing some health challenges, but this is not what brought them to us; they were locked…

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Compatible and Sub-optimal Formation

Ron & Kathy Feher Interview

Ron and Kathy Feher explain how some aspects of one’s family of origin are compatible can still be harmful to our marriage. That is, we might both have a similar formation in a particular area, but it might be suboptimal in terms of the relationship.

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