The Commitment Challenge #2

What Are The Signs And What Do They Mean? In today’s dating scene there is a great deal of confusion about commitment and what it means. Scott Stanley*, one of the foremost thinkers on commitment, suggests that the old ‘commitment phobia’ explanation doesn’t fully explain the dilemma in which dating couples find themselves. One reason…

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The Commitment Challenge #1

Commitment Phobia We’ve heard the phrase bandied around for years, but is it really as simple as someone being afraid of, or threatened by, making a commitment to his or her dating partner? Usually the ‘Commitment Phobia’ accusation is leveled towards the man in the relationship with the related belief that it comes down to…

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Kiss Me Quick!

Sex or Nothing? Kissing is highly under-rated in our culture. Since the sexual revolution, sex has come to dominate romantic relationships and dominate our thinking about what it means to be sexually intimate. Even married couples of more traditional values, where sex is confined to within marriage, can fall victim to this sex-or-nothing thinking about…

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Knot Yet #8: Finding Myself

How important is it to have a solid self-identity before committing to marriage? When emerging adults in committed relationships are polled about why they haven’t yet married, a common theme is ‘the need to find themselves’. They don’t feel ready to give themselves totally in a marriage relationship because they are uncertain about their self-identity.…

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Knot Yet! #7: The Continuity Factor

Is there any continuity between single life and marriage? Or is success (or disaster) in marriage just a matter of fate? Many people assume that what they do as singles will not affect their future marriage relationship. They see single life as the opportunity to ‘have some fun’ and ‘live it up’ before they ‘settle…

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Knot Yet! #6: The Marriage Drain Myth

Does marriage take more than it gives? Is it a drain or is it a reservoir? “You’re throwing your life away!”, was the message one bride in her early twenties was told. Many people delay marriage, and discourage other young would-be newlyweds, because they believe that marriage demands more than it gives. There is a…

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