Married Couples
Marriage: to be happy or to be holy?
“And they lived happily ever after”… it’s the ending of the fairy tale love story and has become the expected story line of most modern day couples. Swept away by passion and the overwhelming experience of ‘falling in love’, couples expect the wedding to seal their happiness in permanent (and effortless) marital bliss. Of course,…
Read MoreResolutions to Have and to Hold
It’s a new year, a new beginning. Among all the goal setting, consider what you can do to transform your marriage. Have you ever noticed that New Year resolutions often have a repentance nature? Resolutions such as ‘to drink less’ or ‘to give up smoking’ directly identify behaviours we readily associate with vice. Even those…
Read MoreLove in the Waiting
Advent is the season of waiting; we wait in anticipation of the coming of Christ. But are we the only ones doing the waiting? I (Francine) was hurrying to get out the door for 7am Mass. I looked at the time on the car clock and sighed in defeat: 6:58. There was no way…
Read MoreGratitude: Plant Now, Reap Later
As we look forward to the new year, lots of us are making resolutions, setting goals, planning for the coming months. Most of our colleagues in the marriage education field are posting articles about setting relationship goals – an excellent idea, but we’d like to propose something different. It has been well established that gratitude…
Read MoreThe Honey-Do List Standoff
How do you get your husband to do the household jobs you really care about? How to do you get your wife to stop nagging and micromanaging? These are questions to which almost every couple across the globe can relate; the never completed ‘To Do list’ wives prepare for their ‘honey’ on the…
Read MoreTIME – The Currency of Relationships
There’s an old adage in the world of parenting advice: Kids spell LOVE as T.I.M.E. Kids don’t need things nearly much as they need a parent’s attention and availability. It’s a classic mistake we make all too often; we give them stuff we’ve bought instead of the thing they most need from us – our…
Read MoreMartyrs for Marriage Through the Ages
While couple saints inspire us to emulate them in our homes, it’s the martyrs for marriage who embolden us in the public square. Marriage – as God planned it – is foundational to revelation. Beginning in the creation of stories in Genesis (Ch1 & 2), marriage is central to how humankind images God. This…
Read MoreEchoes from Childhood
Unpacking the hidden ways our earliest bonds influence love and trust in our adult relationships. One of the most powerful topics in the SmartLoving Engaged course addresses formation in our family of origin. The family is where we first encounter love and learn to relate with others. That’s why the Church calls the family “a…
Read MoreThree Tools for Better Conflict
Every marriage has conflict. Two imperfect people sharing a home and dealing with all the pressures of modern life? It’s inevitable! But conflict doesn’t have to be destructive. Whether it’s the sting of misunderstanding, silent withdrawal, passive aggression or a shouty, foot-stomping exchange, conflict shows up regularly in married life. Busyness, stress, and insufficient…
Read MoreMaking the Connection…with Arguments
Neither of us likes it when we disagree, yet we’ve had more than a few in our 28 years of marriage – some of them leading to horrible arguments. When disagreements descend into arguments, they usually become hurtful and unproductive, leaving us feeling bitter and exhausted. But are arguments all bad, or always harmful?…
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