Posts by Francine & Byron Pirola
The Passion Principle
One of the great delights of running marriage enrichment retreats for couples, is hearing all the amazing love stories. From beginning to end, every one of them has mystery, radical self-sacrifice and epic persistence in some capacity. We often joke that our own love story is more akin to a soap opera than real life…
Read MoreHow to Forgive More Easily
We remember those long nights in the first year of our marriage. In the infancy of his career, Byron was often late home from work as he juggled the demands on his time. Initially, Francine was so grateful when he finally arrived that she didn’t register the hurt that his lateness caused. Over time and…
Read MoreThe Power of Ritual
Some years ago, we attended a Smart Marriages conference in the United States. One of the most memorable inputs was from Dr Bill Doherty, a family therapist and author. Over dinner, he engaged the audience in telling stories about their relationship rituals, before unpacking how rituals work to strengthen marriages. It confirmed for us some…
Read MoreListening is the Music of Love
One of the most supremely loving gestures we can give another is to listen to them. Yet for most of us, being listened to is a rare experience. What makes it so hard to give this simple gift to each other? We remember those days so well. The early romance days. Living in two different…
Read MoreUndoing the Knots is Easier than you Think
September 28 marks the feast of Mary Undoer of Knots. The devotion is over 300 years old and is based on a Baroque painting by an unknown artist located in Germany. The painting features angels feeding a knotted rope to Mary who unties the knots one by one. It was inspired by an ancient homily…
Read MoreUnconditional Love is a Contradiction of Terms
A Story Over the last few months, we have had several conversations with a woman who is struggling with a difficult situation. Her best friend is having an affair and is planning a new life without telling her existing boyfriend with whom she has lived for almost seven years. Not only is this woman distressed…
Read MoreChange Starts Here
Part 4 of It Takes One to Tango. See others in this series here, here. and here. All change in our relationships should start with ourselves. While it’s comforting to be able to blame our spouse for the inadequacies of our marriage, expecting them to change to meet our demands is not only ineffective, it’s not…
Read MoreMaking Stumble-Stone Altars
There will be mistakes. We will make errors and we will mess up in this marriage business. Obstacles and challenges will be part of every romance. The critical issue is how we respond to these inevitable stumbles. We attended a beautiful wedding recently in country NSW and came away inspired by the depths of faith…
Read MoreWhy Reality TV Makes Us Stupider
These days we rightly talk a lot about exploitation and abuse. It comes in many forms and we worry we might walk past it without noticing. Recently 665,000 Australians not only walked past but sat and watched something that we should recognise for what it really is – workplace exploitation abuse. The airing of ‘reality’…
Read MoreForward Planning your Family Planning
Some years ago, I (Francine) was teaching a couple fertility awareness. They had been married five years and assumed that once they discontinued the pill, they would get pregnant straight away. Two years later it still wasn’t happening for them. From what I could see, there was nothing obvious in the their fertility biomarkers that…
Read More