Posts Tagged ‘Marriage’
Virtue in Action
In many of our courses, we teach couples strategies and skills for navigating relationships more effectively. As important as these frameworks are, research suggests that they are not the critical factor in avoiding divorce or building a successful marriage. Rather, the key appears to lie elsewhere, in the practice of virtues. Virtues are personal characteristics…
Read MoreSpare the Left-Overs
It’s that time of year again – the season of joy and gluttony. By the time Christmas day is over, our refrigerator will be filled with yummy, delectable left-overs. Unfortunately, not all left-overs are so delicious. Too often in a marriage, instead of our best selves, we serve up the less than appetising left-overs. We…
Read MoreMore than “I’m Sorry”
Saying sorry and asking for forgiveness are two very different factors in resolving arguments. Saying Sorry is Simple We were in the midst of yet another disagreement. We were both hurt, and we knew it was time to let go of our case and make up. But it’s hard to say sorry. It’s even harder…
Read MoreSexual Integrity in a Messed-up World
Last month we convened a national symposium to explore how we, as a church community, might pastorally respond more effectively to those impacted by pornography. While not a fun topic, it is an important one. Important for three reasons. Firstly, pornography usage has been normalised and is now endemic, and not just among men, or…
Read MoreMarriage or Matrimony?
People call a lot of relationships ‘marriage’. Everything from cohabitation (common law marriage) to civil contracts (secular marriage) to the Judeo-Christian concept of covenant. In a Christian marriage there is a desire for the marriage to be open to the Lord and a willingness to look to scripture and the Church community for direction. If…
Read MoreMaking marriage last is all in the Intention
No matter how easy it may seem to fall in love, staying in love requires attention and effort. We all start out in marriage bright in hope and full of brimming love. Yet rarely do those wonderful, euphoric experiences of early love persist unabated; for many of us disillusionment creeps its way into our consciousness…
Read MoreDeep Impact Conversations
“How was your day?” It’s one of the most common questions couples ask each other and either leads to a dead-end response like, “fine” or “busy” (which usually means “I don’t want to talk about it”), or a long-winded description of meetings, frustrations, errands and other ‘busy’ stuff. It’s what we call a ‘data transfer’…
Read MoreA Little Restraint Goes a Long Way
It happens all the time – one of us does or says something and it triggers a harsh reaction. To break the habit of reactivity, try this mindfulness tool to develop the virtue of restraint. While often associated with Buddhist meditation, Mindfulness has in fact been a feature of many religions under different names, including…
Read MoreRomance and Mystery
One of the things that makes a new romance so exciting and attractive is the element of uncertainty: Is this person really interested in me? Will this person really be the one I’ve longed for? We can all relate to the thrill of the start-up relationship where the other is essentially still a stranger and…
Read MoreCalled to Greatness
The word ‘vocation’ comes from the Latin ‘vocare’ which means ‘to call’. Our primary vocation, the one we all share, is the vocation to holiness. We are called to follow Christ and be in relationship with him. From the Pope to a newborn – it is the same call and equally compelling. A secondary vocation…
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