Romantic Love: Feeling or Choice?

From Hollywood to Cleo, the cultural representations of Romantic Love are clear: it’s a spontaneous feeling of attraction and affection for another. And like all feelings, we don’t choose it: it’s something that just happens to us. We spontaneously ‘fall’ into love and we are powerless to prevent it. To be sure when it strikes,…

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Sex: for pleasure or life-giving love?

From the so-called ‘articles’ in Playboy to public billboards, the social discussion on sex and its function is ever more obvious. The cultural view of sex is that it’s an activity. We talk about ‘doing it’ and ‘we did it’; an activity primarily done or performed. Moreover, the activity of sex is very clearly categorised…

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Loving Smart

How to Love Over many years we’ve come to realise that most of our mistakes in love come from the assumption that everyone experiences love the same way. A number of authors have developed frameworks to help us understand the foolishness of this idea. For example, in ‘The Five Love Languages’ Gary Chapman recognises that…

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The BS Detector

Mind Over Matter ‘Mind Reading’ is one of those clairvoyant arts that seems to elude us when it comes to marriage. Too often we make the mistake of assuming that our spouse knows what we need without communicating clearly about it. How many times have we, or our spouse, declared in exasperation to the injured…

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