Posts Tagged ‘knot yet’
Unplanned Childlessness
“My daughters are in their thirties. They always hoped to marry and planned to be starting a family by now. It is so hard to see them grieving this loss.” It’s a common story we hear among our peers. Their single children are in their twenties, thirties and forties. Many of these are well past…
Read MoreKnot Yet! #5: Responsibility Phobia
What comes first, maturity or the responsibility? In the world of adultescence, the absence of the necessity to be responsible, delays maturity. Most of us look back at adolesence and shiver – it’s a tough time developmentally when the young person is reaching for independence but doesn’t quite have the mental resources to cope with adulthood. Many…
Read MoreKnot Yet! #4: Marriage Horizon
What comes first: maturity or marriage? Most of us think that maturity should precede marriage, but research suggests that marriage itself is a maturing process. Marriage and family are well known to have a ‘civilising’ influence on participants. We really noticed this impact in ourselves when we had our first child. All of a sudden…
Read MoreKnot Yet! #2: Age does matter…sort of
Does age matter when it comes to marriage survival? Almost everyone has an opinion, so let’s do some fact checking! It seems like good advice – well-meaning parents offer it all the time… “you’re too young to get married, you don’t know what you want from life yet.” In fact, the prevailing ‘wisdom’ of the…
Read MoreKnot Yet! #3: Ticking Clocks
‘The biological clock’ is phrase often used to describe the sense of urgency childless women experience as they age. But are women the only ones whose fertility is age-limited? We’re all familiar with the proverbial ‘biological clock’ that relentlessly taunts childless women reminding them that their time is running out. It’s one of the reasons…
Read MoreKnot Yet! #1: Too Young to Wed
When is a person too young to marry? The age at first marriage has differed throughout history and cultures. It’s no news to anyone that the age at first marriage has been steadily rising in almost every developed nation over the past four decades. In the 1960’s both men and women typically married in their…
Read MoreKnot Yet #8: Finding Myself
How important is it to have a solid self-identity before committing to marriage? When emerging adults in committed relationships are polled about why they haven’t yet married, a common theme is ‘the need to find themselves’. They don’t feel ready to give themselves totally in a marriage relationship because they are uncertain about their self-identity.…
Read MoreKnot Yet! #7: The Continuity Factor
Is there any continuity between single life and marriage? Or is success (or disaster) in marriage just a matter of fate? Many people assume that what they do as singles will not affect their future marriage relationship. They see single life as the opportunity to ‘have some fun’ and ‘live it up’ before they ‘settle…
Read MoreKnot Yet! #6: The Marriage Drain Myth
Does marriage take more than it gives? Is it a drain or is it a reservoir? “You’re throwing your life away!”, was the message one bride in her early twenties was told. Many people delay marriage, and discourage other young would-be newlyweds, because they believe that marriage demands more than it gives. There is a…
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