How to Forgive More Easily

We remember those long nights in the first year of our marriage. In the infancy of his career, Byron was often late home from work as he juggled the demands on his time. Initially, Francine was so grateful when he finally arrived that she didn’t register the hurt that his lateness caused. Over time and…

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Undoing the Knots is Easier than you Think

September 28 marks the feast of Mary Undoer of Knots. The devotion is over 300 years old and is based on a Baroque painting by an unknown artist located in Germany. The painting features angels feeding a knotted rope to Mary who unties the knots one by one. It was inspired by an ancient homily…

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Unconditional Love is a Contradiction of Terms

A Story Over the last few months, we have had several conversations with a woman who is struggling with a difficult situation. Her best friend is having an affair and is planning a new life without telling her existing boyfriend with whom she has lived for almost seven years. Not only is this woman distressed…

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A Field Hospital For The Soul

We’ve written a lot about forgiveness, about the need to forgive others not just because Jesus’ commands us to do so but because it liberates us to receive love. As we approach 30 years of marriage, like most long-married couples we understand the relevance of forgiving the other all too well. But what about receiving…

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St Valentine and Revolutionary Marriage

St Valentine

It’s St Valentine’s day next week. This year, it coincides with Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent and a traditional day for penance and fasting. Oh dear! What to do?! Some think this is a pity; normally we focus on romance and joy for the lover’s feast and it’s hard to do that on…

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Help For Marriages Under Stress

January is typically the peak month for divorce applications in English-speaking countries. Having made the decision to divorce, many couples agree to postpone the application for one last Christmas together as a family. The parents hope that by delaying the devastating news until after Christmas, the children will be able to enjoy the day and then have a few weeks…

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When Mercy is Hard to Do

Our last column (Bringing Mercy to Marriage) generated some interesting comments from readers on our blog so we thought we’d expand on the topic – what it is, what it isn’t and how to be merciful when your spouse is seriously flawed. All of us are prone to selfishness. The task of Christian maturity requires…

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Bringing Mercy to your Marriage

It’s Divine Mercy Sunday this week, one of our favourite feasts. Inspired by the writings of St Faustina, a Polish visionary of the 20th century, this feast honours God’s infinite capacity for forgiveness. We’ve had more than a few spats in our marriage. There. We’ve said it. People often expect us to be somehow impervious…

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Forgiveness – A New Year Resolution you can keep

Too many New Year resolutions falter because they fail to address what really needs changing: the internal disposition that compels us into unwanted habits. A few years ago, we got a letter from an irate reader. We were tempted to point out his clear misinterpretation that led him to conclude almost the direct opposite of…

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Why is forgiveness so hard?

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In this Year of Mercy, there’s lots of talk about forgiving: God’s expansive forgiveness and our own obligation to forgive others. We get it. It’s important. Incredibly so. But why is it so darn hard to do? From our earliest experiences as children, we’ve been told how important it is to forgive. We also taught…

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