Search Results: listening
Habit Makers, Habit Breakers
Lately, we’ve slipped into a not-so-good habit. After dinner, and after all the normal stuff is done, we collapse onto the couch in front of the TV. We settle into our various devices – answering emails, prepping for meetings the next day or updating our SmartLoving social media accounts. Before we know it, a couple…
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Lockdown – show down
Tips for couples to survive the Corona lock down The Corona virus is not just a threat to our physical health – it’s also a challenge to our relationships. Across the world, couples are rediscovering the joy – and the pain – of living together 24/7. Without warning, billions of previously interdependent spouses now share…
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Delusions of Superior Communication
Here’s a question for you: How would you rate yourself as a driver – below average, average, or above average? How about your IQ (intelligence)? And finally, how about as a tennis player? Research by psychologists tells us that most people overestimate their driving ability and intelligence compared to others, while they will be much…
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Lesson 1: A Mission to Love
Lesson 1 Summary A Mission to Love Unpacking Love Summary of Content Approach your marriage as a mission to convince the other that they are loved and loveable. If we make marriage our mission, we are more likely to succeed. Challenges couples to prioritise their marriage. Sexual differences are a gift. Men and women relate…
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Lesson 2: Dialogue
Lesson 2 Summary Dialogue Verbal Communication skills Summary of Content There are different levels of intimacy at which we can communicate: cliché, facts, opinion, emotions, needs. Emotions and needs are unique and deeply personal. Key Concept: Intimate communication occurs at the levels of emotions and needs. Emotions are symptoms of our needs, are unique to…
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Investment in Marriage
Anything worth having is never free. As Francine and I raced around on a typical Saturday afternoon we found ourselves at the local shopping village together. Never one to waste the opportunity to gain a ‘good husband’ brownie point, I declared we should have a ‘coffee date’. Naturally, Francine obliged – she practically never says…
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The Smarter Way to Love
Falling in love is easy. Staying in love requires a conscious decision and focused investment. Loving the Smart way is easy when you know how. Our romance was a whirlwind of delight and passion. Over an intense two years, we courted with a dedicated focus: from the very beginning, it was clear that we were…
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Bringing Mercy to your Marriage
It’s Divine Mercy Sunday this week, one of our favourite feasts. Inspired by the writings of St Faustina, a Polish visionary of the 20th century, this feast honours God’s infinite capacity for forgiveness. We’ve had more than a few spats in our marriage. There. We’ve said it. People often expect us to be somehow impervious…
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TIME – The Currency of Relationships
There’s an old adage in the world of parenting advice: Kids spell LOVE as T.I.M.E. Kids don’t need things nearly much as they need a parent’s attention and availability. It’s a classic mistake that we make all too often; we give them stuff we’ve bought instead of the thing they most need from us –…
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Forgiveness – A New Year Resolution you can keep
Too many New Year resolutions falter because they fail to address what really needs changing: the internal disposition that compels us into unwanted habits. A few years ago, we got a letter from an irate reader. We were tempted to point out his clear misinterpretation that led him to conclude almost the direct opposite of…
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