Wedding Stress Tamed!

Planning a wedding is busy and stressful. There’s lots to think about and lots of factors to consider in every decision: the budget, the aesthetic, and the cost-benefit.   The practical reality of organising the many details is complicated by the tension of negotiating differences between each other while navigating the expectations of extended family and close friends. Well-meaning parents, siblings and friends can inadvertently ramp…

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Perfectly Imperfect Marriages

Despite the promises of Hollywood and fairytales, the perfect marriage is the one that helps us grow the most. And that’s not likely to be a marriage without hardship or trouble. Yesterday, as we were preparing to run a training session later on, we had ‘one’. An argument of sorts. It was more like a ‘splat’…

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Marital Conflict Gone Global

When conflict arises in a marriage, it’s not uncommon for us to seek validation for being upset. So we look for ways to strengthen our case and justify our complaint against the other. If the issue has been building for a while, the temptation to globalise our complaint intensifies. Globalisation is a form of exaggeration.…

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#18 Anchored

In the summer of 2021, Tony Manfredonia, a songwriter, found himself on the brink of destroying his marriage. Lost in the relentless pursuit of career success, he had forsaken the most precious pillars of life: Love, Family, and Faith in God. His album, “ANCHORED”, is a testament to the snares of temptation that threaten to…

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Criticism: the not-so-silent killer

Criticism kills. It undermines our confidence and corrodes relationship trust. In relationship research, it is identified as one of four destructive relationship habits.   We’ve all experienced the negative impact of criticism, especially from loved ones. Sadly, it’s been present in our marriage and family far too often.  Most of our criticism originates in a complaint.…

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#17 Accompanying The Abandoned

When a marriage breaks down, it’s rarely by mutual agreement. More commonly, one spouse wants to leave and the other wants to rebuild. For the abandoned spouse, it is bewildering, traumatic and distressing. Yet the situation is complicated – both spouses are in pain. How can we, as a community and as individuals accompany the…

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New and Improved SmartLoving BreakThrough 

We are excited to announce that we have completed the revision of the BreakThrough course. This included updates to the activities and the generation of a new and expanded participant workbook. This is the first stage of a bigger project to create a Companion track where participants can have a BreakThrough Companion (minister of SL…

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Softly Spoken Wins the Heart

“Honey, we need to talk!” Every spouse knows that what follows will be an uncomfortable conversation – one that will likely be bruising if not outright hurtful. Yet, having a difficult conversation is sometimes necessary. All couples need to be able to maturely address issues ranging from selfishness, neglect, or simple differences of opinion. So…

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#16 Frustrated Marriage

Frustration, disillusionment, irritation – it’s common for spouses to experience a variety of disappointments in marriage. From mild and temporary setbacks, to sustained desolation, spouses are often unsure how to get out of the marital funk. In this episode we explore some key ideas to ease the marital frustration and regain serenity. Guest: Byron Pirola…

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The Power of Why

Our three-year-old granddaughter has entered the ‘why’ stage. Parents everywhere know exactly what this is… the endless rounds of ‘but why?’ dialogue. Sometimes, she just doesn’t like the answer to why she may not have a second piece of cake. Like the parable of the lazy judge, perhaps she can compel a more favourable response…

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