Married Couples
What is Happiness Anyway?
Part 4 in the Quest for Happiness Series Speaking of what makes a wife or husband happy (see SmartLoving The Equality Myth, What Women Really Want & What do Men Want?) perhaps we should look at what happiness is and more importantly, whether it really is the ultimate goal. ‘Happiness’ should be distinguished from ‘joy’.…
Read MoreWhat Do Men Want?
Part 3 in the Quest for Happiness Series In all the discussions about what makes a wife happy (see Smart Loving What Women Really Want & The Equality Myth), it strikes us that the happiness of husbands is often overlooked. Actually, it’s rarely on the agenda. That in itself says something about us as a…
Read MoreWhat Women Really Want
Part 2 of the Quest for Happiness Series If equality in work isn’t the answer for making happy wives (see Smart Loving, The Equality Myth), what is? According to the same study that looked at the division of labour*, the best predictor of marital satisfaction among wives was emotional connection. ‘Emotion work’, as psychologists call…
Read MoreThe Equality Myth
Part 1 of the Quest for Happiness Series Inequality in the division of labour at home has long been a sore point for married women. In theory, the egalitarian model of the modern dual-income, shared-homemaking marriage should solve this problem; as women move into the paid workforce, men would assume more responsibility at home.Right? This…
Read MoreMarriage Enemy #1: Lethargy
We asked a marriage counselor friend of ours about why a marriage fails. We were expecting a long complex answer so we already had a bottle of wine open. Yet her answer was short. According to her, if there are no addictions or mental illness involved, then most marriages fail through simple, straight-forward laziness. Almost…
Read MoreHow Often Do Men Need to Have Sex?
Shaunti Feldhahn is an author and social researcher who specialises in marital relationships. In this article she responds to a question from a female reader about how often men need sex: “Even though I can go weeks or months and not miss it, he says he wants me to want it like he does.” Shaunti…
Read MoreIs marriage meant to make you happy?
Byron & Francine Pirola discuss the purpose of marriage is this excerpt from The Marriage Kit, an online course for married couples. Marriage isn’t meant to make us happy. Rather, marriage is meant to help us grow and ultimately that leads to fulfilment. There can be no fulfilment without growth. We all seek happiness, but…
Read MoreRomance in Scripture
Why is the Song of Songs favoured by mystics? What is it about this book in the Bible that attracts so much attention? Surely the answer is that the language – poetic, erotic and sensual – speaks profoundly to the hearts of those who hunger for intimacy with the lover of our souls. This…
Read MoreSexuality – A Resource for Loving
Sexuality touches upon every aspect of our personhood, body and soul, and it is expressed as either masculinity or femininity. It is developed and expressed primarily through relationships. Our masculinity or femininity draws us into relationship and makes us attractive to the other sex. When we are attracted to another, our good qualities are brought…
Read MoreThe Father-in-Law from Heaven
When we marry, we not only gain a spouse, we also gain a family including a father-in-law. When we marry in the Christian faith we also get a heavenly Father-in-Law. BEFORE you start wondering which happy husband or wife is blessed with such a father-in-law – our own are pretty good, by the way –…
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