#4 Communication

Communication is one of the key topics that couples say is so important. While most engaged couples believe they are great at communication, many married couples say they could use some help. What’s going on? Did these couples somehow unlearn how to communicate? Join us as we explore communication – the pitfalls, the benefits, and…

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#3 Your Family of Origin

Our family of origin is the most influential formation because our early childhood experiences created the foundation through which all other experiences were interpreted. We like to think that we are independent thinkers and our own person. The truth is, we are products of our upbringing and experiences. Guest: Would you be willing to join…

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Making a change for the better

Change is difficult. It can also be complicated. Despite our best intentions, sustained change often eludes us. We’ve had many spouses tell us that their husband or wife promised to change, and things were good for a while, but then there was a relapse. Their good intentions were not enough to sustain their energy for…

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The Art of Apology

Have you ever experienced the situation when someone has apologised but, while the words were said it lacked something, making it difficult for you to accept it? Sadly, most of us are not as good at apologising as we need to be. We think that it’s obvious, should just be instinctual, or that our love…

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Three Ways to a Resilient Marriage

We’ve been hearing from many of our SmartLoving leaders around the world looking for help in supporting couples under stress. There’s certainly lots of stress going around with pandemic induced changes and uncertainty. It got us reflecting on marital resilience – the ability of a relationship to endure and persevere through difficulties. There is quite…

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The Epic Battle in Every Marriage

If there is one thing that the seasons of Lent and Easter bring into focus, it’s the struggle between good and evil. At its heart, the Easter story is an epic tale of Perfect Love (Jesus Christ) facing down and conquering Evil. It’s not just an historic struggle – it goes on every day in…

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Best Lent Ever…For Your Spouse!

Lent as ultimate change maker

While lots of people make resolutions for the New Year, most of these optimistic beginnings fizzle out before the end of January. Thankfully, Lent gives we Christians another, and a better, chance of success. One year, about two decades ago, a close friend of ours shared with us how she decided to give up blame…

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Our family is a mess!

The Christmas Vigil Mass features the Gospel of Matthew (1:1-25). Depending on whether you get the long or short version, you might hear the genealogy of Jesus Christ – a rather long list of the forebears of Jesus, going all the way back to Abraham. It includes some of the most dysfunctional characters from the…

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When history repeats, choose freedom

We remember sitting with a young couple who were locked in combat. She was prone to reactive outbursts and he was mystified as to what he was doing to trigger it. As we probed her on her family of origin the penny dropped; she was repeating a relationship pattern that she had established with her…

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