Conflict
Married Singles Unhappily Ever After
We all start out in marriage with a dream; a dream of a life-long, love affair. But after a year or two, disillusionment sets in and the unreserved trust and intimacy we enjoyed becomes tentative and fragile. We join the army of other ‘married singles’ living our parallel lives and wishing that the other sex…
Read MoreWedding Stress: Dealing with In-laws
When you marry, you marry into a family. And your fiancé gets more than just a new spouse, he/she gets another branch of the family – your family! Read on for tips on handling tension with in-laws. This is how it has always been, but in recent decades, the reality of extended family has come…
Read MoreFinding Reverse
Stuck in drive When visiting Rome recently, we borrowed a friend’s car to drive out of the city for a day. Everything was going fine (despite the fact that Roman drivers ignore the lane markings!), until we turned down a one way street the wrong way. Another car, traveling in the right direction, stopped, waiting…
Read MoreMid-Life Madness and other Stressors
As mid-lifers in the midst of working through some of our ‘issues’, we are acutely aware of how easy it would be to let our individual stuff derail our marriage. It’s normal for a person in midlife to be irritable and volatile. Some react with depressive symptoms, others get angry and aggressive, others withdraw or…
Read MoreGetting Help
If your marriage is in strife and you need some help, it’s important to make sure you get the right help. Unfortunately, many counsellors and therapists will accept couples for couples counselling without having any specific training. Couples therapy is a unique and one of the most difficult counselling tasks and you deserve a therapist…
Read MoreThe Ikea Assembly Meltdown
Building your own furniture… it’s an unstated test of true manhood. Guys gravitate to the challenge, particularly when it’s a guaranteed shoo-in. Meet the Ikea* Challenge… it’s supposed to be easy right? Any idiot can assemble an Ikea item. That’s the first good reason why any self-respecting guy isn’t going to use the instructions. The…
Read MoreThe Ikea Carpark Battle
We know the scenario: a frazzled couple, stroppy kids and a car that just isn’t big enough to fit all the stuff they’ve just bought in store. Over-tired and over-sugared children seem destined to test the tolerance of their parents while an impatient driver waits conspicuously for their parking spot adding pressure to the situation.…
Read MoreWhy Couples Fight in Ikea
“Why do couples fight in Ikea?” friends asked us. They had made a long-planned store visit on the weekend and almost every couple they encountered, including themselves, were stressed, tense and exchanging angry words. What starts out as a highly anticipated (often romantic) outing soon derails and the ‘loving feelings’ flee the scene at a…
Read MoreMarital Resilience
Let’s face it – marriage is a tough gig these days. With divorce rates higher than we’d like, too many families are being torn apart by marriage breakdown. What can couples do to immunize their marriages against this tragedy? Marital resilience starts with a well-grounded understanding of what marriage is and what it isn’t. A lot of…
Read MoreHug to Diffuse
When the tension mounts, what can couples do to restore their harmony? The Connect Hug is simple and powerful. Learn how to hug to diffuse. It’s happening again. Suddenly we find ourselves in that all too familiar territory: we’re gridlocked in an argument about goodness-knows-what and it’s starting to turn nasty. Our spirits deflate. We…
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