Reconciliation

Love means more tha saying “I’m sorry” Concept: Forgiveness Forgiveness is not an emotion. Forgiveness is a choice; a choice to let go of your resentment against your fiancé. Forgiveness is a vital step to the restoration of your unity. There’s a difference between the ‘I’ centred statement “I’m sorry”, and the other centred statement,…

Read More

Restoring Unity

Be angry but do not sin. Do not let the sun set on your anger. Ephesians 4:26 Reconciliation and healing can be a great source of growth and grace in a couple’s relationship. Reconciliation teaches couples how to be more sensitive to the other’s feelings and needs and how to love the other more effectively.…

Read More

Seven Deadly Habits

Research by Dr. John Gottman and others has helped us to understand the specific behaviours which are so deadly for marriages. He is able to predict with high degree of accuracy whether a couple will divorce, by the way they argue.* You’ll want to avoid these Seven Deadly Habits that characterise marriages headed for bust.…

Read More

Conflict

What distinguishes couples in lasting marriages from those in more fragile ones, is not the absence of arguments, but the presence of respect and cherishment. When couples fight, what hurts is not the fact that their spouse disagrees with them, it is the contempt and indifference with which it is often packaged. Contempt – the…

Read More

Stop. Reflect. Connect.

FOR DECISION MAKING Whenever you are making a difficult or important decision, or disagree about how to go about something, the Stop-Reflect-Connect tool for Decision Making can be used. It helps you to avoid an argument by refocusing you on your priority – your fiancé and your relationship. Stop! Before the disagreement escalates to an…

Read More

Embracing the Other’s Value

The call to unity is a call to be predisposed to see things from a couple perspective, taking the other into account and embracing that which affects one as affecting both. …Making what is important to your fiancé important to you… When you make what is important to your fiancé important to you, they will…

Read More

Conflicting Values

Behind every behaviour or decision that you make, is a value; something that you hold in high esteem and is advanced in some way by the action. For example, making the choice to work back late may reflect any one of a number of values, such as: having pride in doing a job well, reducing…

Read More

Priorities & Ideals

What are your priorities? Priorities and Ideals are principles that you embrace as important to the quality of life you hope to experience. An Ideal is something you believe is good and desirable, however it remains an Ideal if you are not yet ready to make the sacrifices necessary to fit it into your life.…

Read More

Everyday Communication

Good communication… IS ALWAYS OTHER-CENTRED The best way to stay other-centred and ensure effective communication, even amid the stress of every day situations, is for the Speaker to make it easy for the Listener to listen and for the Listener to encourage the Speaker. Both the Speaker and the Listener are responsible for the quality…

Read More

Emotional Communion

Emotional Communion is more than just reading or listening actively to what our loved one is sharing. It involves opening our heart in vulnerability to the other, so that we can enter into his or her emotion and be united with them in the experience. The goal of Emotional Communion is to take on the…

Read More