Posts by Francine & Byron Pirola
Mating Market – Sheila Shortages and Man Droughts
In the modern Mating Market every one is a loser. When it comes to love and the quest to find a life-long mate, it is common to talk of being ‘in the market’. It’s a bit crude but it does reflect the reality of many people’s experience. Like a shopping for a car or a…
Read MoreHow to Help a Marriage in Trouble
Over our years as a married couple we’ve had numerous occasions when people have approached us about their troubled marriage. It hasn’t always been in the context of being the facilitators at the marriage seminar either – sometimes it’s just a friend looking for support or a family member needing a sounding board. What we’ve…
Read MoreMaking the most of single life
Many people see single life as the opportunity to have some fun and ‘live it up’ before they ‘settle down’ to marriage. In fact, some see it as vital to do so – they argue that failing to ‘experience life’ a bit before marriage will lead them to be restless in the marriage, full of…
Read MoreAvoiding the Divorce Flu
A new study has documented what counsellors have observed for years: divorce is contagious. Just like a virus, divorce spreads among social networks and influences marriages among the divorcing couple’s friends, family and work colleagues. For example, got a divorced sibling? Your chances of divorcing go up by 22%. A divorced friend? Up by 147%.…
Read MoreKnow What You Want
Part 3 of It Takes One to Tango Perhaps you’ve heard the saying: Failure to plan is a plan to fail. So many people fail to experience the fullness of their ambitions in all sorts of areas such as health, friendships, career etc. simply because they fail to plan. Without a plan, we are like a…
Read MoreDo Something Different
Part 5 of It Takes One to Tango Too often people don’t think or act ‘sanely’ when it comes to their marriage problems. Picture this common scenario: a wife is frustrated that her husband doesn’t help more around the house. She nags and badgers him but it doesn’t inspire him to step up and be…
Read MorePassion and domesticity
One of the greatest challenges couples face in our contemporary age is the presumption of sexual excitement. When the romance wanes, marriages are at risk – but what’s a couple to do when passion is in decline? We’re all in favour of a vibrant and passionate sex life for couples however it’s not always easy to…
Read MoreKnot Yet! #5: Responsibility Phobia
What comes first, maturity or the responsibility? In the world of adultescence, the absence of the necessity to be responsible, delays maturity. Most of us look back at adolesence and shiver – it’s a tough time developmentally when the young person is reaching for independence but doesn’t quite have the mental resources to cope with adulthood. Many…
Read MoreMarriage Nomads
We’ve been reading a book on the writings of St John of the Cross and in one section the author talks about perseverance in the ‘Nomad Culture’. St John was a Spanish Carmelite in the fifteenth century so we were confused by this reference to Nomad Culture – it didn’t sound like he was talking…
Read MoreLike Father, Like Mother
In our household, the traditional stereotypes of father as disciplinarian and mother as comforter don’t describe us very well and that’s probably a good thing. However, we do tend to parent quite differently. Byron is more likely to provide study or career planning advice, and to engage with the children around sport. He’s more likely…
Read More