What is Happiness Anyway?

Part 4 in the Quest for Happiness Series Speaking of what makes a wife or husband happy (see SmartLoving The Equality Myth, What Women Really Want & What do Men Want?) perhaps we should look at what happiness is and more importantly, whether it really is the ultimate goal. ‘Happiness’ should be distinguished from ‘joy’.…

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What Do Men Want?

Part 3 in the Quest for Happiness Series In all the discussions about what makes a wife happy (see Smart Loving What Women Really Want & The Equality Myth), it strikes us that the happiness of husbands is often overlooked. Actually, it’s rarely on the agenda. That in itself says something about us as a…

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What Women Really Want

Part 2 of the Quest for Happiness Series If equality in work isn’t the answer for making happy wives (see Smart Loving, The Equality Myth), what is? According to the same study that looked at the division of labour*, the best predictor of marital satisfaction among wives was emotional connection. ‘Emotion work’, as psychologists call…

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The Equality Myth

Part 1 of the Quest for Happiness Series Inequality in the division of labour at home has long been a sore point for married women. In theory, the egalitarian model of the modern dual-income, shared-homemaking marriage should solve this problem; as women move into the paid workforce, men would assume more responsibility at home.Right? This…

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Marriage Enemy #1: Lethargy

We asked a marriage counselor friend of ours about why a marriage fails. We were expecting a long complex answer so we already had a bottle of wine open. Yet her answer was short. According to her, if there are no addictions or mental illness involved, then most marriages fail through simple, straight-forward laziness. Almost…

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Is marriage meant to make you happy?

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Byron & Francine Pirola discuss the purpose of marriage is this excerpt from The Marriage Kit, an online course for married couples. Marriage isn’t meant to make us happy. Rather, marriage is meant to help us grow and ultimately that leads to fulfilment. There can be no fulfilment without growth. We all seek happiness, but…

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In Marriage, Big Boxes Can Be Trouble

Humour is an indespensible asset in a marriage. This week we feature an exerpt from this very funny story by Cindy Chupack in the NY Times. Click the link to read the full article and view an animated interview by the author and her husband. In any marriage, even the best marriage, there will come…

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When should Goldilocks marry?

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Almost everyone has an opinion about the optimum age to marry – usually heavily influenced by their own happy or unfortunate history. But what does the research tell us? A recent study by Nicholas Wolfinger (USA) and reported in the Institute of Family Studies (here) challenges the common perception that divorce incidence decreases with age…

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The Soul Mate Quest

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Chasing ‘Happily Ever After’ It sounds so romantic: ‘Destiny’ has each of us perfectly matched with someone with whom we will form an instant rapport. All we need to do is find that special someone and bliss will surely follow. All our heartache, all our problems will be history as we lose ourselves in the…

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