Five Ways to Build Trust

Today we had a meeting. Sigh… The dreaded meeting! Being a couple and working together is complex. We’re both strong-willed and passionate about what we do so it’s easy for us to slip into a mode where we single-mindedly pursue what we believe is the best course of action. It triggers us both for different…

Read More

How to Forgive More Easily

We remember those long nights in the first year of our marriage. In the infancy of his career, Byron was often late home from work as he juggled the demands on his time. Initially, Francine was so grateful when he finally arrived that she didn’t register the hurt that his lateness caused. Over time and…

Read More

Marriage on Fire

||||

At the time of writing, fires are still blazing across the Australian landscape with many tragedies of life and property lost. Even if not directly impacted, many of us have friends, family and colleagues who are. And it is not over yet. In our case, Christmas Day saw Byron and two of our sons depart…

Read More

Programmed for love or for trouble?

We were recently hosted overnight in the country home of friends. It was a beautiful experience in every way. Our hosts greeted us with warmth, housed us in a tastefully appointed bedroom and nourished us with a delightful meal. Their home was a beauty to behold; magnificent views overlooking the valley, landscaped gardens and an…

Read More

A marriage of contention

couple

What seems hard in marriage is often doing us good A few weeks ago, we were invited to attend an event featuring Jordan Peterson. Curious to see this Canadian psychologist and academic, who was touring Australia with sell-out audiences, we took up the offer. One of the questions put to him by an audience member,…

Read More

It Takes One to Tango

|||

We’ve all heard the saying: it takes two to tango. But is it true that the only way to improve a marriage is if both husband and wife co-operate? Marriage is like a dance. If one spouse changes his or her steps, that changes the dance. The truth is, it only takes one spouse to…

Read More

The Midlife Crisis Reinvented

Recently we were talking with a woman whose husband is in the grip of a midlife meltdown. Actually, she wasn’t the first; there have been a string of them over the years, all unique in their story line, but also sadly similar. The so called ‘midlife crisis’ has been stereotyped over the years with caricatures…

Read More

Trigger Warning: You might not like this!

We write a lot of articles together. Usually one or the other will do the first draft taking the idea forward as much as they can. So far so good. It’s when it gets to the next stage that things often derail. We each have a distinctive writing style and we construct our argument using…

Read More

Bringing Mercy to your Marriage

It’s Divine Mercy Sunday this week, one of our favourite feasts. Inspired by the writings of St Faustina, a Polish visionary of the 20th century, this feast honours God’s infinite capacity for forgiveness. We’ve had more than a few spats in our marriage. There. We’ve said it. People often expect us to be somehow impervious…

Read More

The Blame Game – IKEA Carpark Couple Therapy

The scenario: a frazzled couple, stroppy kids and a car that just isn’t big enough to fit all the stuff they’ve just bought in store. The setting is ripe for the good old ‘blame game’. Visit an IKEA carpark on a weekend afternoon and you’ll spot dozens of hapless couples caught in the blame cycle.…

Read More